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Conflict with Lisa Rothman


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“Our needs are never in conflict. It’s the strategies that we use to meet our needs that get us into conflict.”

Lisa Rothman

This is episode 97 and today I’m here with Lisa Rothman talking about Conflict Prevention & Repair.


Lisa’s a mom who has spent more than 20 years learning, practicing, and teaching collaborative communication skills. The tools she’s mastered and created resolve conflicts with children in her own family and in families all over the world.


Name: We speak to the meaning behind her preference for the term Collaborative Mindset over Nonviolent Communication.

Discovery: She shares how she discovered collaborative mindset and why she has dedicated her life to practicing it.

Template: We walk through her template for this conflict prevention and repair process.

Capacity: We discuss why acknowledging capacity limits is a more relational, softer, and effective alternative to boundary setting.

Examples: We share audio clips of Lisa working through this process with two different families (one with a younger child and one with a teenager).

Help with Conflict

While I have been passionately doing this work for decades, I have recently expanded my offerings to include therapy. 16 years ago, upon completion of my graduate education and family therapy practicum, I gave birth to my second child and pivoted from therapy to coaching, which has allowed me to show up for you and for my children, in full alignment with my values. In recent years, my children have grown into greater independence, my capacity has increased, the therapy landscape has evolved, and I have felt called to expand back into the therapeutic space, where the deep, rich, meaningful emotional labor I do with families is more visible and valued. This is an exciting mid-life evolution for me and I’m hoping you’ll all cheer me on! I continue to offer all of the support that you all have come to appreciate like the Sage Family Village, courses, podcast, and coaching with families all over world, but for folks residing in Washington state, I can now also offer the support of therapy. To learn more, visit

Dive Deeper

Disclosure: When I recommend a product that I believe will add value for you, it may contain an affiliate link, and when you click the link to make a purchase, I may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you.

Lisa’s Website

Conflict Prevention Jumpstart Kit
Lisa’s YouTube Channel
Lisa’s Google Doc of Additional Resource Recommendations

Nonviolent Communication Template

Nonviolent Communication Book

Sage Family Podcast 77: Boundaries

The methodology and philosophy Lisa shares has been inspired by, developed with, and passed down through a lineage of teachers including Marshall Rosenberg, Miki Kashtan, Inbal Kashtan, and others. 

The Nonviolent Global Liberation Community co-founded by Miki Kashtan works on a global scale to recreate the kind of collaboration that Lisa supports within families. 

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I work from an island in the Pacific Northwest, where I live wild and free in connection with my hilarious husband and three growing sailors in our fixer upper on the beach. I authentically live this healing work out loud raising my own neurodivergent family (inner child included) and draw on my decades of education and experience (I've done all the nerdy work so you don't have to) to guide a revolution of overwhelmed parents just like you to feeling at peace within yourself, consciously connected with your children, embraced by a supportive community, and enjoying a values-aligned life you love.

Gentle parenting, natural homeschooling, & simple living mentor

I'm Rachel Rainbolt

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